At last, some energy is shifting. After months of looking at rental property sites, we have found somewhere to move to. When I think about it, I’ve been looking for somewhere different to live for more than six months and it has occupied my mind, my spirit and of course a lot of my time.
There were many moments when my husband and I wondered why it was so hard to find somewhere new to live. Perhaps our brief – pretty much anywhere in East Sussex – was a bit too vague. Maybe the fact we wanted somewhere with space, combined with conveniences and on-tap services and commuting options was a bit hard to come by. Was it more appealing to live near woods and rivers, or would a spell by the coast be better? Were we aiming too high with our modest budget? Or was it that the underlying factor was simply that we were a little afraid to deal with the inevitable hassle that comes with moving house? Could it simply be that we weren’t really ready for change?
To be fair, if anyone is more attached to this neck of the woods – SE London – it’s me. I’ve pretty much lived between East Dulwich and Bromley for most of my life, save for some glorious years between here and living in Costa Rica. Hubby on the other hand has moved around all over the place prior to meeting me twenty years ago, and changing his living environment is something he is very used to. As he has often reminded me over these many months, he would be happy moving to Northumberland, or wherever…
The biggest move we jointly made was to sell up and move to Costa Rica – now that was all about change. Wow, what a year 1998 was for us. We quit our respective jobs. We got married – twice. Once in the UK and once again in Costa Rica in front of 50 friends who’d made it out there to be with us. I sold my flat. And we packed up to go live in the tropics…And in every fibre of my being, I knew that this was good change, this was life changing change. This was the kind of change that shapes who we are.
“Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.” - Andre Gide
Yes, it was a dramatic move for us, but I can look back at that time as a most incredible era of learning, of growth and of discovery because there was always movement over those 10 years or so. New people, new experiences, time here in the UK, months there in the jungle…So I can appreciate very much how keeping life flowing can allow the winds of change and opportunity to circulate freely. It makes one open to new possibility and less fearful in general. So it’s really no surprise that after spending almost three years post baby in one place, and on top of that, a place that hasn’t resonated with my spirit, change was needed.
“By changing nothing, nothing changes.” -Tony Robbins
I think many of us get stuck in that comfort zone of sameness; the velvet groove of life that somehow just feels snug and safe. It seems to take a lot of energy, or commitment to lift ourselves out of that space and risk change. Other times we don’t make a move because we don’t know what path to take, or because we have too many options. We’re almost paralysed by that choice. You know how sometimes you can go to a restaurant where the menu is simply too vast, just too many dishes to choose from? Life can be a bit like that sometimes. Should I take this job, or that one? Should we move here or there, or down there? And because we fear making the wrong choice, or that somehow we’ll end up regretting our decision, we make no choice.
And so that’s why we’ve finally decided to go for it. To move out of here and try something new. Because in the end, not choosing, and not going for that shift was slowly crippling us. We don’t know actually if this house we’re moving to, indeed the location we’re moving to is ‘right’. We’ll only know that once we’re there. But I do know what’s right is the change itself.
“The best thing you can do is the right thing; the next best thing you can do is the wrong thing; the worst thing you can do is nothing.” -Theodore Roosevelt
Already since making the decision, we each have a renewed energy. Already, there are new work opportunities presenting themselves. And despite the relative ‘hassle’ of packing boxes, changing addresses and organising ourselves, the bottom line is change=creation.
I leave you with this final quote from Mark Twain.
“20 years from now you will be disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the one’s you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”